That moment you stop lying … To yourself

As the 6th month of the year came to a close. I sat under the shade of a tree and wrote this missive:

I can’t help but to reflect on the rapidity that has led to this, the 30th day of the 6^th month of 2016.

These revelatory moments have happened with such frequency that they have ceased to be foundation shaking.

I’ve learned a lot about myself in 2016, accordingly I’ve written a lot about coming face to face with the glaring contradictions that we opt to turn tail from and hide, especially when they reside in the close confines of self.

Truth be told, it was difficult coming to terms with the putrid brew of:

duplicity, selfishness, haughtiness and recalcitrance

that made up the person who blankly glares back at me in the mirror.

We exercise unbridled passion in lying to ourselves and we excel at it.

But –

Humility is the great equalizer and it is this entity that everyone – at some time or another must come to terms with.

However, the choice that must be made is often fumbled.

How do we intend to come out on the other side?

Do we double down in the pits of contumacy or do we endeavor to come out on the other side cloaked in humility and empowered because of it?

Is it too much for us to process the very act of dying to who we were and pledging to allegiance to the possibility of being better than who we were?

Over the course of 2016 I have had the privilege of bearing witness to the personification of everything that was wrong in me – from the vantage point of people that I interacted with.

That toxic brew that I alluded to earlier:

duplicity, selfishness, haughtiness and recalcitrance

– served to be instructive.

As it humbled and did something far more consequential…

Truth be told, it was absolutely the last thing I expected – it fed the emaciated confines of my faith.

I was given a gift of selflessness and dedication with a simple lease – to be a reflection of those who exuded it.

This journey through the valley of my flaws doesn’t have an end – and it shouldn’t, but it should have an ongoing purpose.

A continuous process of evolution is tantamount to searching for God’s face – and I’m beginning to understand that my mistake was in shifting my gaze away from the glare.

Being a servant to that which is greater than you and remaining cognizant of the fact that we all have a role that must be played – is the foundation on which our journey is lain.

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