A question that has plagued mankind since time eternal has been comprised of 4 to 5 simple words.
We’ve uttered them in no shortage of venues…
In darkened rooms.
On deserted shores with the roar of the ocean serving as an audience to our angst.
Or with our eyes locked towards the heavens.
We mumble inaudibly, sometimes with our eyes overflowing with tears.
Other times we erupt with an anger that is infused with indignation to ask:
“What is taking so long?“
Strangely enough, we halfheartedly expect an answer.
Or in those instances when the question is posed to us directly:
“What is taking YOU so long?”
That same question has the ability to render the most eloquent of us flummoxed.
Since 2012, I have used this blog as a sounding board for my uncertain journey.
This search for God’s face that was indirectly born in the wreckage of smoldering car on an abandoned street in Baltimore more than 5 years ago used to haunt me.
My body healed relatively quickly, but it took my spirit much longer to follow suit.
My spirit was broken in more parts than I knew existed.
The paths that I’ve ventured down have been long, winding, torturous – and admittedly I’ve often wondered if there is any veracity to assorted queries that I am…
“Wasting time on things that don’t matter…”
Truth be told, I can’t say that I have all of the answers.
When it comes to the confines of the spirit, I’ve learned that it is imperative that we walk until we hear it.
More often than not, it is the metaphors of life that serve to inform our steps.
While I’m on the subject of wandering…
The 4th book of the Bible is the book of Numbers, which details the story of Moses and the Israelites wandering in the desert before arriving in the Promised Land.
I am not a Biblical scholar by any stretch of the imagination, but it was the recalcitrance of the Israelite’s (their lack of supplication) which lead to their 40 years of “wandering” in the wilderness.
I allude to this because I’ve slowly come to the realization that there is no such thing – as a straight path to God’s face, we all are guilty of “wandering” at one or another.
We are sentenced to wander until that part of us that that served to impede – dies.
Or in the case of my non-religious, non-spiritual, secular readers…
The path to epiphany – or to put it plainly:
That Aha moment!
The fork in the road that lead me onto the path of evolving into an accidental, then a reluctant and eventually – a duty bound amateur genealogist.
Has been instructive.
It has lead to the scattered fibers of my faith being mended and infused with a greater understanding of the foundational elements of honor which thrive in the form of my family.
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